By Vic on March 3, 2010
Whatever I have, whether I think it’s little or much, I am to be faithful over. But never let me forget that God alone gave me all that I have: my perceived strengths and weaknesses.
To think that I am the master of my future is to fall into a deep idolatry. Self has become god, not God himself.
This week I’ve felt myself literally burdened to illness with worry over preparing for sharing at the Gen12ii commissioning. I felt all the weight of speaking and teaching with effectiveness, all on my shoulders as if I was the one to make it effective by my cleverness and gifts. The flip side is of course the worry that I am not wise enough, nor gifted to be an effective messenger.
Therein lie the symptoms of my idolatry: when I fear the possibility of failure, when I feel hopelessness over what I perceive I cannot accomplish, and it drains me with worry and anxiety. What this means is that if I do well I will believe that I produced success with my own resources. It’s really the opposite side of the same idolatrous coin.
That is when I must heed the warning: let the Scriptures teach again. Nebuchadnezzar was the greatest king of his time, but God had to teach him to humbly recognise the divine origin of his greatness. Only then could he lead wisely and justly.
When God humbles by letting us feel our helplessness and loss of control, let us always repent of pride and respond in joyful confidence of his goodness and power. Into his hands, I must commit my spirit.
Lord help me to continually go deeper and let you, my Saviour, truly save me from my sin.
Posted in Regular |
